What one week of cultural immersion will do to you

It humbles you: I came here believing that I would have great success and fluidity with the language whose culture I adore so much. My French grades would reflect that potential. Unfortunately, watching Amélie a handful of times does not make you fluent in anything except French kitsch. I find myself struggling with the most trivial of conversations. My lack of finesse is evident in the number of salespeople who have tried (without success) to ‘English’ me; speak in English when I try to speak French. Nothing is more infuriating than when someone asks me, “You speak English?” in as equally of a broken accent as my French. I didn’t come all the way to France to order a kebab en Anglais!

It equips you: Living in a fairly metropolitan city has its conveniences- public transport, nightlife, and culture clash being among them. However, one has to develop a sixth sense when it comes to sketchiness since all the others are subdued. In my case, my ever-reliable navigation abilities have gotten me lost several times on the way home-at night. This wouldn’t be a problem if my neighborhood didn’t drop off from being well lit and populated to Rapeville at every other block. Strength in numbers is my motto now and I try to be extra vigilant when alone. I hope this will sharpen my perception at home and prepare me for the ‘Big City’ life. Now I only need to master French insults to keep the drunkards from trailing me.

It annoys you: Communication is sort of my thing. I pride myself in being a chameleon; ready and willing to blend into any situation, even cultural. I like sharing commonalities, swapping stories, and making really dry jokes. Now I can do none of these. How can I have a shred of personality when I only comprehend 35% of what’s said to me? That, as well as not being able to get what’s in my head out is frustrating. I’m suffering from verbal constipation. The only remedy is to compensate socially in English-right? Wrong. My fellow API friends and I have found solace in using English when talking to one another because, well, it’s just easier. Yet speaking in English all day does zero for your retention- even when you live in the country and have been exercising your language muscles for well over 6 years. I’ve been here for almost 2 weeks and I feel like I’ve peaked. I’m annoyed because I feel mute when I can’t speak, infantile when I do speak, and silly for even trying when my interjections are met with “Je ne comprends pas”. I wish I could fast-forward through this phase and just be able to flirt in French.